Post by Chicago Jake on Jul 24, 2008 0:08:15 GMT -6
Okay, I don't really expect or care if anyone reads this. I just need to vent a bit.
First off, though: this is UNITED AIRLINES. Got that? The assholes are UNITED AIRLINES. Let that be known throughout the land.
I get to the airport (O'Hare, ORD) about 1 pm for my 3 pm flight to New York. I check in at the electronic kiosk. It tells me that my flight "may be delayed" and would I like to standby for an earlier one? Seems the 1 pm flight has not yet left (it's delayed already) so I say, sure. I get a confirmed boarding pass for my 3 pm flight, and a standby pass for the 1 pm. Seems both flights are delayed due to Air Traffic Control delays; rain between here and there.
I get to the gate for the 1 pm flight, get cleared on the standby list, and get on the plane. This is about 2 pm. At 3 pm, we're still at the gate, and everyone is ushered off the plane. Why? "Oh, it's just a precaution; we'll reboard soon." Bullshit! As soon as we're all off, we're told the flight is canceled. Fuckers!!
I go to the agent. They've rebooked me... on my original 3 pm flight! Now scheduled to leave about 4 pm. I race to the other terminal where this plane is, get on. We sit. And sit. And sit. Finally, we're told to get off. Another ground delay.
I sit there at the gate, as every 30 minutes they delay takeoff by another 30 minutes! Finally, at 10 pm, we get back on, and, Halle-Fuckin'-Luiah, pull away from the gate! My third boarding of the day, and my first pull back!
But the joy was short-lived. We taxi for about 20 minutes toward the runway. Suddenly, the pilot SLAMS on the brakes! The plane screeches to a halt!! I look out the window, and a line of buses is filing past us. What the fuck!?
The pilot comes on the PA system. Nothing about the buses. He informs us that there is another ground delay in NYC, and we're going back to the terminal. This is about 11 pm. We might take off about midnight, he cheerfully informs us.
We get off. As we're filing off the plane, the Captain announces that the flight is canceled, and there will be no more flights to NYC tonight. There will be a gate agent in the terminal to help us rebook.
I was seated near the back of the plane, as I always like to do. So by the time I'm out and get in the rebooking line, it is a mile long. But I'm smart, right? So while waiting in the line, I call United reservations 1-800 number on my cell phone. It rings, a robot dude asks for my info, then I wait. And wait. And wait. Assholes!!
Finally, I am close to the front of the line. There are two people in front of me Yayy!!! This is close to midnight. I hang up the cell phone, get ready to talk to the Customer Service dude. But, he decides that he has to close up shop for some reason, announces that he is closed, and the rest of us should go to the main Customer Service desk "near the dinosaur." (If you've ever flow on United out of ORD, you'll know what that means. If you haven't, don't worry about it.)
I go to the main CS desk. The line is MILES long. Well, not literally miles, but it is literally hundreds of people. I wait in the line for about twenty minutes, and it NEVER budges. Not an inch. Worse yet, assholes are sneaking into the line ahead of me. All this while, I'm back on the phone, on hold again.
Finally, I say "FUCK IT!!" and get out of line. I stay on the phone. I go down the escalator, out of security, wait in the taxi line, get in a cab, give him my home address, all the while still on hold with the 1-800 number. FINALLY after about 15 minutes in the cab (maybe 35 minutes total phone wait time) I get a person. I tell her, "I'm on my way home to bed in a cab, please don't book me on the 6 am flight like everyone else wants; 10 or 11 am would be just fine!" I figure, I'm doing her AND me a favor here. Ha! I'm living in a fools paradise. The first flight out with an open seat is at 4 pm!!! Mother Fucking Shitballs, Batman!!!
Oh well, at least it is tomorrow, not in the middle of next fucking week!!!
So now I'm home alone instead of in the arms of my sweet Hazelita, having spent a charming day at the fucking airport, hopping in and out of airplanes like Madonna hops in and out of beds, and NEVER FUCKING LEFT TOWN!!!
Okay, rant over. As Scarlet O'Hara says, "Tomorrow is another day!" Let's just hope I don't have to burn down Atlanta to get to NYC!!........Jake
First off, though: this is UNITED AIRLINES. Got that? The assholes are UNITED AIRLINES. Let that be known throughout the land.
I get to the airport (O'Hare, ORD) about 1 pm for my 3 pm flight to New York. I check in at the electronic kiosk. It tells me that my flight "may be delayed" and would I like to standby for an earlier one? Seems the 1 pm flight has not yet left (it's delayed already) so I say, sure. I get a confirmed boarding pass for my 3 pm flight, and a standby pass for the 1 pm. Seems both flights are delayed due to Air Traffic Control delays; rain between here and there.
I get to the gate for the 1 pm flight, get cleared on the standby list, and get on the plane. This is about 2 pm. At 3 pm, we're still at the gate, and everyone is ushered off the plane. Why? "Oh, it's just a precaution; we'll reboard soon." Bullshit! As soon as we're all off, we're told the flight is canceled. Fuckers!!
I go to the agent. They've rebooked me... on my original 3 pm flight! Now scheduled to leave about 4 pm. I race to the other terminal where this plane is, get on. We sit. And sit. And sit. Finally, we're told to get off. Another ground delay.
I sit there at the gate, as every 30 minutes they delay takeoff by another 30 minutes! Finally, at 10 pm, we get back on, and, Halle-Fuckin'-Luiah, pull away from the gate! My third boarding of the day, and my first pull back!
But the joy was short-lived. We taxi for about 20 minutes toward the runway. Suddenly, the pilot SLAMS on the brakes! The plane screeches to a halt!! I look out the window, and a line of buses is filing past us. What the fuck!?
The pilot comes on the PA system. Nothing about the buses. He informs us that there is another ground delay in NYC, and we're going back to the terminal. This is about 11 pm. We might take off about midnight, he cheerfully informs us.
We get off. As we're filing off the plane, the Captain announces that the flight is canceled, and there will be no more flights to NYC tonight. There will be a gate agent in the terminal to help us rebook.
I was seated near the back of the plane, as I always like to do. So by the time I'm out and get in the rebooking line, it is a mile long. But I'm smart, right? So while waiting in the line, I call United reservations 1-800 number on my cell phone. It rings, a robot dude asks for my info, then I wait. And wait. And wait. Assholes!!
Finally, I am close to the front of the line. There are two people in front of me Yayy!!! This is close to midnight. I hang up the cell phone, get ready to talk to the Customer Service dude. But, he decides that he has to close up shop for some reason, announces that he is closed, and the rest of us should go to the main Customer Service desk "near the dinosaur." (If you've ever flow on United out of ORD, you'll know what that means. If you haven't, don't worry about it.)
I go to the main CS desk. The line is MILES long. Well, not literally miles, but it is literally hundreds of people. I wait in the line for about twenty minutes, and it NEVER budges. Not an inch. Worse yet, assholes are sneaking into the line ahead of me. All this while, I'm back on the phone, on hold again.
Finally, I say "FUCK IT!!" and get out of line. I stay on the phone. I go down the escalator, out of security, wait in the taxi line, get in a cab, give him my home address, all the while still on hold with the 1-800 number. FINALLY after about 15 minutes in the cab (maybe 35 minutes total phone wait time) I get a person. I tell her, "I'm on my way home to bed in a cab, please don't book me on the 6 am flight like everyone else wants; 10 or 11 am would be just fine!" I figure, I'm doing her AND me a favor here. Ha! I'm living in a fools paradise. The first flight out with an open seat is at 4 pm!!! Mother Fucking Shitballs, Batman!!!
Oh well, at least it is tomorrow, not in the middle of next fucking week!!!
So now I'm home alone instead of in the arms of my sweet Hazelita, having spent a charming day at the fucking airport, hopping in and out of airplanes like Madonna hops in and out of beds, and NEVER FUCKING LEFT TOWN!!!
Okay, rant over. As Scarlet O'Hara says, "Tomorrow is another day!" Let's just hope I don't have to burn down Atlanta to get to NYC!!........Jake
