What Can We Say ??
( a play in 2 acts )
ACT 1
Deb: What can we say? How can we do better than last years?
Lee: The virgin report was simple. We just splashed our heart all over the pages.
You told of your fears and anxieties, how completely out of your comfort zone
You were. For me I just had to remember a few details, that along with the feelings
We shared, and presto the first trip report wrote itself. This one is gonna be tough.
Deb: This is your 3rd try. You’ve written for hours now. Don’t stay up too long.
Lee: No you don’t. You don’t get to run off this time. I need you here to help write this thing. Sit here in the big chair. I’ll ask a few questions and we’ll see where it gets us. Pull the chair up close.
Deb: Is this close enough, or should I sit on your lap ?
Lee: That’s not a bad idea, but we want to get this thing done . Ready ? How did this one compare to our first Hedo trip?
Deb: Compare ? There’s no way to compare the 2 trips. The first one was our 30th anniversary. It was a special trip just for us. That’s why we chose the SWWW group this time . they could not compare.
Lee: Well did you like the group thing ?
Deb: Yeah it was fun, going with a group. I had a great time planning for the activities, and I know you did too. Didn’t you ?
Lee: You know I did. It took me a while to find all the pirate things, and you know I like you shopping for Hedo evening wear . It took a while to knit that chainmaille top, but it was worth it. This time the group thing was a great idea. It worked well - Not to mention we got great prices on the resort thru Denny’s group rates, We had a great time chatting with others before we left, and saw smiling faces when we got there. This group was just the right size. Small enough to remember most of the people’s names, yet large enough to get lost in if we wanted..
Deb: Yeah and I liked the activities. I know I didn’t get to do a lot of them, but they were fun to watch. I must be a fun voyeur. The pirate party was fun, and I don’t know how you talked me into the wet t-shirt contest. If Kathy and Elaine weren’t in the
thing too I probably would have ran offstage. it’s a good thing you can’t sing. You would probably want to do the talent show.
Lee: No way. John wrote his own song, and I could never get up and sing half naked in front of 300 or so friends. I will jump off a cliff naked, but will never, never perform in public.
Deb: I’m glad we went on the cat cruise, how did we miss that last year. We should have gone on the night cruise too. The games were fun. Hedolympics were great to watch and you know I love wearing beads I earn. The Beadgo was great. It
looked like everyone in the pool was involved . That was a great idea.
Lee: You were grinning during the EGE. I know I enjoyed it, glad we both brought presents.
Deb: When are you gonna try on that whole body condom you won ?
Lee: After we run out of nipple drop’s and Dickalicious. I’m not sure the whole body condom will fit me. We could always save it for next year.. Naw, we will have to find even more outrageous gifts if we go again. There were some great gifts this year.
Deb: That bouncy inflatable vibrating dildo pillow thingie looked wild. Next year we shop harder. Your just a dirty old man. Between shopping for the EGE and all the fashion shows I gave you there were days you didn’t stop smiling. You still haven’t showed me all the pictures you took of me trying on all the different clothes. , You are a lucky asshole sometimes. Its time to quit for tonight . Move away from the computer for a while. Give it a rest. Here take a look at these. Now follow me to the bedroom. It’s time to go nite nite
Fade to black
Intermission
Act 2
Deb: Are you at it again ?
Lee: I really want to get this thing done. You know that reading the trip reports made it easier for you to go last year, and sometimes they ease the DIF, Denny works hard to keep the website up to date. It doesn’t hurt us to write one of these things. You know that when I am done I’m gonna need you to edit the thing after it’s written. It’s kinda like saying Thank You.
Deb You bet I’m gonna edit it. When I get done we may be Bobby and Buffy. You may get to be Buffy. That thing isn’t going to Denny without my ok !
Lee: OK I get it. Tell me your good memories of the trip. Don’t get fancy. Just the highlights
Deb: The People we met. You know I’m not great at meeting new people. Most everyone there made me feel welcome. We were almost the oldest in the group, but Bob and Elaine made Hedo look easy. They had energy. I know we didn’t meet everybody, and some of them had met before so they knew each other longer, but I think everybody worked hard to make others feel at ease. You know there are people we met that I will keep in contact with until we meet them again .
Lee: Are you really gonna ch-ch-change our names to Bobby and Buffy ?
Deb: No I won’t make you do that, Our names are common, and are all over Denny’s website. There are some people that would be uncomfortable with their names shown for all to see. Please try not to mention names if you can help it.
Lee: OK Let’s get back to the good memories. Start again.
Deb: Again ? Ok The people we met. All of them, not just the ones from WWW. Room 2260 even with the leaky shower and 2 beds shoved together to make 1, That dinner at Munahana. Oral did a great job cooking that night it was much better this year. The catamaran cruise. We should have gone on the night one. I know you liked watching the tourists gawking at the blonde wearing the strap-on on the cruise. Robert at the grill, he is one of my favorites. A good looking guy who will cook for me. Napping while it rained. This may take a while. There is so much Those kids in the steel drum band, The raisin bread. Watching you land on your ass jumping off the cliff. Your turn for a while. I need to think about it.
Lee: This should be easy: The people we met. Dressing like a pirate and administering the pirate pledge. Those tattoos lasted longer than I thought. Watching Noel try to inflate the raft. It took 2 full tanks of air. Rum Cream. How did I miss that last year. I’m glad we brought a couple of bottles back. The ladies dressing up for dinner !! You in the wet t-shirt contest. It was great to see you smile. Should I keep going ?
Deb: go ahead you’re on a roll
Lee: Friday night lobster and shrimp. Throwing mardi-gras beads. Naked Watersliding. Meeting the couple that was upgraded to ocean view nude. They were fun, third visit there and the first time they had been past water sports . The hot tub at night with you. The hot tub in the afternoon with you. The hot tub in the rain with you. Do you see a pattern here ? Shall I continue ?
Deb: Keep going
Lee: The staff we met. The nurses. I’m sorry we needed to meet them, but they were great, Camille in reservations she worked hard for us, Richard Bourke’s hurricane updates, Charlie and William cooking in the morning. You already mentioned Robert. Augustus, and Headley. Foxy, Ray-Ray, Amanda, Delroy, Rum flavored diet Pepsi. I
think it is your turn again
Deb: OK: Finding the rock we painted last year. Watching you land on your butt cliff jumping
Lee: you already mentioned that
Deb: it was funny ! I’m glad we got the photo. Having you apply sunscreen, Applying sunscreen. Henna Tattoos, mine is still holding up pretty good, next time body paint. Laughing. Wearing the clothes you picked out and “built” I’ll never get to do that here. Naked water aerobics. But now we go back to the top of the list. The people we met. The new friends we made. And the name beads That’s the end of my list for now. Its your turn to finish.
Lee: Bare as you Dare. Chainmaille clothing . I’m running out of good memories. EGE, watching you smile. Seeing your eyes smile. You snagged a lot of mine for your list. But we both get to keep The people we met. The friends we made. Do we want to write down the other memories ? I don’t think there were any horrible ones. Just the other ones
Deb: That list is a short one: Hurricane Emily and all the fuss she brought with her. Not being able to phone Air Jamaica to find out anything. Having to check out of the resort just to go to Sangster so we could talk to a AJ person . Waiting Standby all day and then some, But they did get us on the flight. I’ll give them that.
Lee: Your list is tougher than mine. Mine sounds almost silly now.
Deb Go ahead
Lee: Ok having to visit the nurse, Landing on My butt, my lousy toga design, lightning
that close to the hot tub, seeing my favorite towel sinking in the Carribean,
Deb: You know that was an accident.
Lee: I know you wouldn’t do it on purpose. -- aaaaaa---The art auction, Not being able to remember everybody’s name, finding those cards we made with our e-mail address to give to friends still at home, Not getting a photo in front of the no photography sign, and in front of the grotto. Now I’m getting silly.
Emily was a problem. Just not knowing when we would go home was unsettling . The worst for me was on the flight home. Not getting to sit with you, and having to sit in a middle seat.
Now that we’ve been home a week, it was a great vacation. Incomparable. Do you think we might go again next year?
Deb: Right now I’m not sure I want to go to Jamaica during Hurricane season. I do know that I would not hesitate to go again with the WWW’ ers Next time we go Rick and Colleen should come with us. They need a vacation like this. April was great last year. The weather was perfect. Maybe a winter trip next. Or possibly around Thanksgiving. You’re right. We should send a trip report to Denny. Just to say thanks for everything. Maybe you should write down some of this stuff down so you don’t forget .
The end. Bobby and Buffy
