Coney Island, August 2006

[Chicago Jake]

The Pampered Princess and I paid a visit to world-famous Coney Island in Brooklyn, New York this weekend. I had never been there in my life, and she hadn't been back there in awhile. It is a classic, but in a seedy sort of way. Picture a small town mobile fun-fair, with cheesy rides and lots of great junk food, permanently based at the beach, and you've got the idea. There is also a great aquarium which we visited. Here are some photos of the highlights.

Here is the train station that gets you there. It is the end of the line of the F train, about an hour and fifteen minute ride from Hazel's house in Queens.


At the aquarium, we saw lots of cool aquatic life. If you want to know what this one is, just shout out in a Dean Martin voice "That's a moray!"


The aquarium had a special exhibit going on called "Alien Stingers" all about that favorite pain in the ass of all Hedo visitors, Jellyfish. It was really cool, but difficult to photograph. Here are a couple of the few pictures (out of many) that actually turned out....




On the way out of the aquarium, we passed a large painting of a walrus. I hadn't gotten any shots of the walri inside, so here I am with the painting. [photo credit: Hazel]


After we left the aquarium, we were hungry, so we decided to vist world-famous Nathan's Hot Dogs. This place has been immortalized on Seinfeld and elsewhere, so I was looking forward to sampling their cuisine.

Now, my friends, I must tell you something. New York is a great town, filled with wonderful people (not least of which is my own sweet Honey Lamb) and many fabulous cultural achievements. But, there are two things that they just don't know shit about: pizza and hot dogs (sorry, Baby). The hot dogs at Nathan's come virtually unadorned. You can get chili or cheese on them (if you pay extra) and grilled onions or saurkraut for free (if they aren't out of it) and you can add mustard or (shudder) ketchup. But none of the myriad accoutrement that are expected on a proper (i.e., Chicago-style) hot dog are available. Nevertheless, the dogs (virtually naked though they were) were tasty and well cooked.


Here is a shot of some of the other cheesy storefronts along the boardwalk, with an image of the Ferris Wheel in the background.


By the way, they call the long sidewalk along the beach the "boardwalk," and they aren't kidding. It really is made up of boards, many of which are popping up from the flat at alarmingly dangerous angles. Here is a shot of it:


For some reason, there was what I can only call "The School Bus Graveyard" along the boardwalk. Maybe it was just a parking lot for school buses between classes, but they looked retired to me:


Among the cheesy entertainment options was one that will be near and dear to the heart of all Hedo alumni: Their very own climbing turd! Much like the one at Hedo, we didn't see anyone actually using this one either:


And finally, here is a shot along the beach of the hoi poloi enjoying their day in the surf, escaping the heat of the city. If you look closely, near the bottom of the frame you can see shadows of Hazelita and myself, leaning out over the railing of the pier, surveying our domain.

[Irish Stu]

Thanks for the trip report Jake. Coney Island seems similar to many of the coastal resorts in the south of England such as Southend and Clacton-on-sea which are both near us. A combination of fun-fair rides, fast food and the beach attracts Londoners by the thousands every weekend throughout the summer months, then in the winter they become depressing ghost towns. Delightfully tacky and great for a day out, but you wouldn't want to live there.

Simon

[nemo]

Jake,

I'ts obvious you don't know shit from shinola. The hot dog's?...The NY Dog - vs- Chicago?...You guys put so much shit on them ya don't even know there's any meat unless you take it apart....and what's with that bright geen shit and that little pepper?...I mean, if you guys are embarassed about the quality of your "meat then I can understand but hey, a hot dog is a hot dog, I want to eat it on the run not stop, grip with both hands only to find the thing spooging all over me.

The pizza you say? Give me a break! That stuff you guys call pizza is a crime. Deep dish I'm sure. Since when does a "real" pizza have "spinach, bracholi, artichokes, brussel sprouts, bok choi, and whatever else you guys can stuff into a "Betty Croker" pie tin on it? Real men eat real pizza, cheese, sausage, or pepperoni, by the slice at the corner store with their hands. Not sitting down at the table with a knife and fork. A KNIFE AND FORK!!....There is something wrong with it if ya gotta use silverware to eat it.

Sorry about this Jake...but there is a reason they call Chicago the "Second City"

[Mrs. Nemo]

admin said:

New York is a great town, filled with wonderful people (not least of which is my own sweet Honey Lamb) and many fabulous cultural achievements. But, there are two things that they just don't know shit about: pizza and hot dogs (sorry, Baby).

OMG Jake, thank you SO much. Nemo and I have had many rounds about this same subject and I believe that you have just started round 1, 999, 999 between the two of us and it is 3:35 a.m. here. . . . I lived in the suburbs for 20+ years and could not agree with you more. New Yorkers just don't get the hot dog and pizza thing at all. I've had both and I'll take Chicago over New York any DAY. . . .sorry, "baby" (aka: Hazel, Honey Lamb). I'll admit that Nathan's dogs are good, but what's up with the sauerkraut? On a hot dog? And what about that thin crust cheese pizza. . . .you can do that with Chef Boyardee (sp?) out of a box. So thank you for supporting my argument of the last 20 years with Nemo. Maybe one of these days, he'll get it.

[pixiedust]

I enjoyed your report Jake - glad you two had a nice time. (I won't weigh in on the hot dog/pizza thing... ).

Is that walrus a close relation??.... ;D

[♥ COVID-19♥]

pixiedust said:

Is that walrus a close relation??....

I think the caption for that photo should be "Separated At Birth".

BTW, hot dog/pizza: NYC foods are made to eat on-the-run ... either running TO the subway or running FROM the cops.

[Ardbeg... innit]

No photos of Chuck in the aquarium??

[Irish Stu]

bornagaindruid said:

No photos of Chuck in the aquarium??

;D ;D ;D

Simon

[Ardbeg... innit]

Could the walrus be named Chuck perhaps?? (I know, there's no beenie)

[♥ COVID-19♥]

No thong, either.

[Hazelita]

bukkakeboy said:

BTW, hot dog/pizza: NYC foods are made to eat on-the-run ... either running TO the subway or running FROM the cops.

Yeah! You can't run while eating a hotdog that's loaded with SALAD! Salad is just not portable and does not belong on a hot dog. Cucumbers, tomatoes on a hot dog??? ... NO FUCKING WAY!!!

[Ardbeg... innit]

You know, I would have to bet that Jake took those shots at the aquarium (esp the walrus) just anticipating the social experiment aspect (How long will it be before someone links aquarium with Chuck?).

Your obidient Rat.

[Cherbunny]

Like Mrs. Nemo, I also lived in the city and suburbs for 20 years. There was nothing like Art's Red Hots in Half Day, IL which was 1/4 mile from the high school. Depending on how bad of a case of munchies I had, determined what condiments goes on the dog. There are days when I want it piled high with onions, kraut, mustard and cheese, or nothing but ketchup. The best hot dog has got to be Hebrew National.

As for pizza, make mine sausage, mushrooms, and onions with extra cheese in a pan. When I'm hungry, I'll eat just about anything on a pizza.

Cher
who remembers having a shrimp, canadian bacon and pineapple pizza in the 1970's and enjoyed it...probably because I was high and it was free.

[Cherbunny]

Great pics, Jake!

I'm looking forward to the pics you take here.

Cher

OMG! You and Hazel will be here in 10 days!

[jdmcowan]

For those who are adventurous and wish to try something beyond the traditional dog or brat, Hot Doug's near my house is great. They also do a traditional Chicago dog that's very good and inexpensive. I suppose they could do a traditional NY dog too. What's that? Just a piece of meat in a piece of bread from what I've heard here.

Check out the Specials menu at www.hotdougs.com/specials.htm

Jeremy

[Hazelita]

jdmcowan said:

I suppose they could do a traditional NY dog too. What's that? Just a piece of meat in a piece of bread from what I've heard here.

Traditional NY hot dogs are made of BEEF and you can get them topped with mustard, sauteed onions, and sauerkraut for free. You can also have chili, cheese, and jalapenos put on them in most places for additional cost. Cucumber lovers shouldn't bother to ask for it. You'd get laughed out of town.

[jdmcowan]

hazelita said:

Traditional NY hot dogs are made of BEEF and you can get them topped with mustard, sauteed onions, and sauerkraut for free. You can also have chili, cheese, and jalapenos put on them in most places for additional cost.

All available at Hot Doug's, I do believe. But am I correct in thinking that you like little seeds and things on your buns? I don't think Doug can do that.

Jeremy

[♥ COVID-19♥]

The "seeds" (as you so quaintly call them) are not in the bun, but in the actual NYC hot dog itself. Our term for those "seeds" is "assorted mouse droppings".

[Chicago Jake]

bukkakeboy said:

NYC foods are made to eat on-the-run ... either running TO the subway or running FROM the cops.

By George, I think you're onto something there, Beeb! NYC living is fast-paced, so you need a faster type of fast food. It makes perfect sense. Here in the bucolic Midwest, on the other hand, with our slow-paced aww-shucks lifestyle, we can get away with a more leisurely approach to our grub. I think I am beginning to understand this unfortunate divide between our two great cultures.....Jake

[drmryder]

A friend of ours has a relative that has made wienie water gravy to go with the hot dogs. We still laugh when we heard about it. Granted this happened 20 some years ago, but it's still a head shaker!

Edited to add that I don't know if the gravy was ever used with the mashed potatoes that were made to go with it.

[drmryder]

admin said:

By George, I think you're onto something there, Beeb! NYC living is fast-paced, so you need a faster type of fast food. It makes perfect sense. Here in the bucolic Midwest, on the other hand, with our slow-paced aww-shucks lifestyle, we can get away with a more leisurely approach to our grub. I think I am beginning to understand this unfortunate divide between our two great cultures.....Jake

If you live in a slow-paced aww-shucks lifestyle there in Chicago... what the heck would you call the lifestyle up here? We must be even a slower-paced yaader-hey type lifestyle!

Now what is really tasty is a brat. You can load all the New York toppings or the Chicago toppings on it and it still is great! I have found that I like coleslaw on it sometimes. Strange yes, but what can you expect from beer and brat country!

[Ardbeg... innit]

drmryder said:

A friend of ours has a relative that has made wienie water gravy to go with the hot dogs. We still laugh when we heard about it. Granted this happened 20 some years ago, but it's still a head shaker!

An untapped market waiting to be exploited right there.

[Hazelita]

jdmcowan said:

But am I correct in thinking that you like little seeds and things on your buns?

You would be incorrect in your thinking.

[nemo]

I said nothing about putting "bucolic" on hot dogs....it was the pizza you guys put that into.

[Mrs. Nemo]

admin said:

I think I am beginning to understand this unfortunate divide between our two great cultures.....Jake

I have lived with this "unfortunate divide" for 20 years, Jake and trust me it never ends. I can see this debate continuing around the round table when you arrive in Hedo Tucson next week, but be forewarned Nemo and Hazelita, there will be only 2 of you and 3 of us. . . . "Second City" my ass.

[Hazelita]

tinsley said:

I can see this debate continuing around the round table when you arrive in Hedo Tucson next week, but be forewarned Nemo and Hazelita, there will be only 2 of you and 3 of us. . . . "Second City" my ass.

Three of you? You mean you've brainwashed Rick into thinking what you think? Believe me, there will be no debate. If it starts up I'll walk away from the table and lock Jake out of the guest room for starting this whole thing in the first place.

[Cherbunny]

hazelita said:

tinsley said:

I can see this debate continuing around the round table when you arrive in Hedo Tucson next week, but be forewarned Nemo and Hazelita, there will be only 2 of you and 3 of us. . . . "Second City" my ass.

Three of you? You mean you've brainwashed Rick into thinking what you think? Believe me, there will be no debate. If it starts up I'll walk away from the table and lock Jake out of the guest room for starting this whole thing in the first place.

Which Rick are you talking about, Lynn? If it's mine, he's not getting into this discussion. We live in a Drama-Free zone.

[♥ COVID-19♥]

admin said:

By George, I think you're onto something there, Beeb!

Easy does it there, JOHN!

[Merlot Joe]

Thanks for the trip report and pictures Jake looks like fun. We hope we can make it there next year prior to our cruise.

Joe.

[innit Geezer]

bukkakeboy said:

admin said:

By George, I think you're onto something there, Beeb!

Easy does it there, JOHN!

Finally, something he is anal about. Come on, stand up for your borough. Oh I'll do it as your apprentice oh wise one.

www.brooklyn-usa.org/

Jake I'm very impressed with your steady New York tours. I'm a proud New Yorker and love to visit different parts of town but I think you're beating me and I live here.